A pizza shipment woman contravenes of a rich socialite and her hellish cult in Hellish Panic, a brand-new scary funny from Director Chelsea Stardust. Yes, it’s type of a bonkers property, however the trailer is a great deal of enjoyable, mining the very same cheekily profane vein as the Pleased Death Day movies.
Samantha “Sam” Craft (Hayley Griffith) is a pizza shipment woman with remorses. She took this task for the ideas, which ended up being a bad organisation choice. “In 4 hours, my overall revenues are an ended Applebees discount coupon and a sweatshirt that smells like bigotry,” she grumbles. However when an order is available in from the well-off enclave of Mill Basin, she handles the task, although its technically outside the joint’s shipment zone– obviously on the presumption that she’ll lastly get a good idea. What she gets rather is recorded by a hellish cult in requirement of a virgin sacrifice so they can summon Baphomet, a satanic force from hell, therefore guaranteeing they remain abundant and on top. “Death to the weak, wealth to the strong!” cult leader Danica Ross (Rebecca Romijn) states.
Sam does not appear to be completely without, er, allies. The skeevy, lecherous Samuel Ross (Jerry O’Connell) helpfully provides to deflower her to conserve her skin: “No virgin, no sacrifice. Let me secure you.” Her best option is Danica’s defiant child Judi (Ruby Modine), who cautions, ” My mommy and her butt pals are booty-calling Baphomet. And they’re not gon na stop til you’re strapped to a barbed wire altar.” Sure, Danica and her acolytes have all the power, however Sam and Judi have vibrant spunk and an eager desire to live. This being a funny, I like their opportunities.
Naturally, “ hellish panic” is an authentic real-world phenomenon of mass hysteria that reached its peak in the 1980 s, and is no laughing matter– definitely not for those wrongly implicated of routine abuse However as Thomas Browne as soon as observed, “The devil … the happy spirit can not withstand to be buffooned.” So possibly Hellish Panic is doing the Lord’s work by holding the entire tawdry ruin for well-deserved ridicule.
Hellish Panic opens in theaters on September 6, 2019.
Noting image by YouTube/RLJE Movies